Aristotle Throttle

Some other backwards thing

2006-03-07T22:35:00.000-08:00

I imputted (?) my name in one of those quiz things that tells you how the dictionary will define you. "Jared- a master story-teller." Sweet.

But today I miss my mom. She lives too far away. I miss my dog (dead) and best friend since 6th grade (he's in Australia).

I miss the surprises of early adulthood. I remember once holding the steering wheel and shiverring, high on serotonin. Some good person had sent it splashing up my stomach like the Belagio fountain.
I won't Ebay my maturity to buy back the bombshells, but they are missed.

Other threads will reveal themselves tomorrow. I'll shed tears made possible by a new ability to surrender and feel deeply. New dependence. New interdependence. Maybe fall and break. See how the pieces stack next time. And some other backwards event I didn't know could happen.

If you're still here, I'll tell you the story :o)

Slide Platform

2006-02-08T13:44:00.000-08:00

I can see my group home and all its neighboring houses from the platform on our playground slide. This week I've spent several recesses standing up there with whichever kid's around and just looking around. If I had the luxury of more "kid" free-time (which is closer to truly free than adult "free") I could stay there all day.

I can imagine how the lives of our neighbors might be from what I see in their yards. I see old toys abandoned by a teenage kid who's taken up drumming. Who used to drive the junked cars and where to? Which Jones' are toe to toe with one another?

When I look at our campus I consider the horrors perpetrated on children. I timetravel 50 years ago when more than a few beds lined the walls of even-more institutional rooms. The kids behaved so differently then. Didn't they? How did kids respond to such evils in a "Leave It to Beaver World?"

Is there a child in a neighboring house headed for the system? These are heavy questions but they mingle with more peaceful thoughts. They mix with sounds of laughter and play. They span the spectrum from destruction to redemption. They have time. Free time, like kids have.

Wake Up, Hold Your Mistake Up

2006-02-02T00:13:00.000-08:00

Its hitting me that I want to do so much better and be so much bigger. I will have to work harder. I focus well on the selfish side of art and success. Even the selfish side of certain relationships. There are some spots- they occur as early as first thing in the morning when its time to get out of bed. And they are shrouded in excuses. I need to find the closest cliff and jump off. Head first of course. But my hair needs to be just right for the wind.

And I need to accomplish every bullet on my todo list as I fly or I will load the bullets into my machine gun and aim it at my head. But I'll get it done and jaws will drop. And I'll land in a dixie cup of momentum breaking orange jello. Step out, bow and nap a bit before the next jump.

You can suck it Mediocrity.

Truckee Day 2

2006-02-01T18:54:00.000-08:00

Woke up a bit after everyone else. Breakfast was delish. The shower birthed an avalanche of inspiration and idea. I’d like to identify our current goals and then supersize them and get all crazy ambitious with the band. I keep thinking about Project Runway and Stupid Freaking Santino.
We just booked all these shows for February and beyond. Risky. I supposedly like risks. Yeah right, how are we going to get people to these shows! That’s where the shower inspirations must save the day. I’m thinking art and creation like the winning design on Project Runway. Plus Threadless.com which is t-shirt and commerce ideas. Then I’m picturing the little candle floating out on the water. Message in a bottle. Future System Kid fans will stumble across these marketing grenades and get Hooked!